009: Empowering Entrepreneurs- Laying A Strong Foundation & Gaining Clarity Is Key For Success With Michelle From Bonded Permanent Jewelry

Jen: Hey there, I'm Jen Thyrion and I'm so glad you're here. I'm a former nine to fiver that dove into entrepreneurship eight years ago with zero business experience. I'm a wife, mama of two young girls, boutique owner, jewelry designer, and now the proud owner and coach leading GoldieLinks Permanent Jewelry.

I have a passion to empower fellow business babes. This podcast is made to equip you with everything you need to succeed from actionable marketing steps to digging deep on your mindset. I know firsthand the heart, hard work, and let's be real at times, a struggle that makes up this amazing journey. You want to know what has enabled me to shine the brightest coaching plus community here at GoldieLinks.

We share openly educate and lift each other up, expect to get linked with fellow PJ owners that will do just that sprinkled with plenty of fun along the way. Competition is an old school thought and connection is the way get ready to feel inspired. Welcome to the GoldieLinks podcast.

Hey, it's me. I'm going to jump in here real quick. Did you know you can have your own GoldieLinks business? If you've been dreaming about having a successful permanent jewelry business, but you don't know where to start. Or you have a permanent jewelry side hustle and wanna take it to the next level and be a part of something bigger, then I would love to connect.

e's a permanent jeweler since: 2022

It is about setting a foundation for yourself and really building your self confidence, your self worth, getting really clear on your why and how important that is in building that foundation for a successful business. So I felt it was so amazing to talk about this first before we dive into another conversation again.

All about her permanent jewelry business. So get ready for this yummy conversation with Michelle. Okay. Hey, Michelle. Thanks for joining us today. So excited to chat with you, Michelle. Like I already introduced her from Bonded and Michelle Elise Taylor's soon to be coaching. So if you can just start us off with telling us about you, who are you?

Michelle: Okay, so let's do the, in the nutshell, right? I am a, I like to say sometimes a serial entrepreneur. I spent nine years as a photographer in the West coast. I operated in three different states. I moved 12 times in 12 years. Oh my gosh. So crazy and hectic. And then I. I moved out to the West and didn't move my photography business with me.

And I ended up, uh, my friends had, they were the first permanent jewelers in Utah and I ended up opening their first like out of state franchise and kind of meant to do it as like a side project kind of thing. Well, like purpose was to move into coaching. And then I just fell in love with. How I could show up for my clients with permanent jewelry and it like turned into this whole thing.

And all of a sudden I have a brick and mortar and like employees and I don't know what the heck that's all about, but it's like a whole thing. So now we've got both things going on. I'm very like science mixed with woo woo mixed with we can do this. And yet I run into my own blocks all the time, every day.

And I. I believe that growth is a never ending journey and that there's always something to be learned. And yet we also, as we are, are perfect and amazing. So I mean, I guess that's a synopsis of like 30 second trailer,

Jen: Michelle. Well, yeah. And I know we talked prior because again, and someone told me about Michelle, it was actually someone who met her at a retreat and she was saying how she was coming off this amazing coaching program focused on not relying on your partner, right?

How do you word that? Not relying on your partner for you, like yourself. Worth or like, how, how would you put that into a little tagline? Yeah.

Michelle: I mean, I think that the tagline for my coaching, right. Is like who I help, right. I help women in crumbling relationships or struggling relationships who really want to get grounded in their self reconnection.

And so the idea is like, you don't need to rely on your partner. Right. And so I think we were kind of taught that two people have to come together as a whole. Like, Oh, find your other half. Right. Like the terminology for that is that like, yes, you completely, the terminology is that like, you are not inherently whole.

And so I think that that's inaccurate, like, right. We are supposed to come together as two holes and that's when we become. Really powerful. And so my goal with coaching and like my journey that got me here, right. Is like, I showed up as a half, so did my partner. And then as you grow, you kind of get to a certain level where like, if you want to continue growing, you cannot like what got you to where you are, won't get you to where you're going.

And so something had to give. And so I kind of like leaned into that and got really reconnected with my, with myself. And once I did that, things started getting a whole lot, I don't want to say easier, but definitely more aligned.

Jen: So again, we talked about her, obviously she has a permanent jewelry business, which is like very successful.

And we want to, we want to touch on that almost maybe in a different time. We talk because actually I think what's so amazing is that you have both these components that you can, you can share, which is so much value to who's listening. I loved the fact because I know when I started my business and granted, I wasn't in an actually failing relationship.

I wouldn't say that. I'm obviously, I'm still with my husband, Jordan. We, we weren't married yet, but we was the first few years we were together. We moved from Vegas to Colorado and it was kind of this adjustment period. But I just decided to open a Shop. And that was my first business. And there was a lot of growing pains there with us.

There was a lot of rough periods where I felt like I was looking to him to validate what I was doing, and I wasn't getting that from him. So I kept kind of internalizing that and thinking like, I was going to fail at this because I wasn't getting this major support from him that I needed. Like, I was looking for him to like, Tell me I was doing everything right.

Or like, give me the confidence I needed when really I just had to look within myself and do that. I can't, I couldn't get that from him. Just like in every aspect of relationship, like you said, it kind of has to come from yourself versus looking for that other person to fulfill that for you. Right. I think that like, if I would have known that or had a better foundation to start, that's why I think this conversation is important.

So whatever stage you are in business, but especially if you're starting a business and you kind of feel like your partners are not on board, is not letting that. play into your self worth or how, how worthy or capable you are. So I think like this conversation is so great to like set a foundation, like a foundation of a house that you need, right?

In order to build that successful business. How do you feel like that played into, because obviously you had already, you had a photography business prior to, right? And I don't know how long you've been in your relationship, but if you want to share kind of your journey, I guess within that too, um, and how multi coaching and

Michelle: everything.

Yeah. Oh my gosh. So yeah, I think so. I, I, I know that I guess my journey I spent, so me and my partner have been together almost 13 years. Wow. Okay. Arguably the first part of our marriage on the surface felt very successful. Like we had good communication and we had this and we had that and we weren't necessarily struggling, but there were these underlying things that like, looking back, we can be like, Oh yeah.

And then there was like one big thing that kind of was an issue, but we were able to kind of like, we're going to put that to the side. But with business, I was constantly looking to him and ironically he believed me and me a hundred percent. That's awesome. He was, and not everybody has that support.

Right. But like he was like, yeah, totally. I'm here for it. You want to do this? You want to start a photography business? You want to spend money on this conference for this photography business? You want to do this? Yeah. I'm here for I support you. I think you can do anything, blah, blah, blah. And that was never enough.

My photography business, which, and there's a whole bunch of things that played into that, right? Like I had to move my business every year. And so looking back, I look at that and I'm like, it's a miracle. But I was able to keep that running and have the amount of clientele that I did for as long as I did.

But I never made what I would have considered like a successful photography business. I never hit six figures in my photography business and for whatever reason, that was my number. Yes. Always. Yeah, right. It didn't matter how much he believed in me because on a deep level, I ended up really like learning later that I didn't believe in myself, that I didn't believe I can bring in that amount of money, that I didn't believe I could handle the responsibility that I, you know, and so I was never going to get there no matter how much support I got from him or anyone else, because I had to believe it had to come from me.

I think that plays into any stage of your business, right? Because like. I'll be honest, like that's something I'm still dealing with. Like, as I go into this coaching thing, I'm like, goal, I need to know everything. Like I, if I don't know everything, what if I don't know everything? And what if I can't, I need to, I need it all right.

You know, what if I can't hold space for the amount of people that I want to hold space for? What if I can't, you know? And so like at every level, you're going to feel that. And yet it now it's different because I know that I have to figure that inside myself. I think like. We were talking before we started the recording with the podcast about how one thing I, one rule I've made this year is that I kind of am nixing like conferences because I get into this serial place of like, I am seeking validation outside myself.

So I'm going to go and I'm going to go to these conferences and they're going to tell me exactly what I need to do. And they're going to tell me I can do it and they're going to believe in me and they're going to give me all this and that'll make it so I can do it. But it doesn't. And then you come home on a high and then after about a week, you're like, Oh my gosh, I'm the worst.

I'm broken. Everyone else is doing this. I'm sure. What is wrong with me? It's so hard because

Jen: like this, yeah, it's like these. There's so much information out there, which is a beautiful thing because we can constantly be learning. And then all these things of what we should be doing, like whether, how often we should post, how we should post.

And it kind of is paralyzing because like you said, it's like you come home and conferences can be an amazing, beautiful thing because you do learn so much, especially if you're newer at your business or you're, and we're, as you know, whether you're new, but you're always. learning and evolving, right? You always want to elevate and get better at what you've been doing.

So it requires new things, you know, along the way to learn and know. But at the same time, if you come home and you're like, you don't have the belief in yourself, or to like, really like sit down and implement, and then you just keep searching for things and like more knowledge, more knowledge, what else do I need?

And it really, it's like, no, what did you just learn? Let's, let's sit and be silent and implement that. Like you said, rather than just keep. Going and being like avoidance.

Michelle: Right. And I think there's something to be said about, you can get all the knowledge you want, but if you aren't handling your deep core issues, you will never be able to implement it.

So like I was in plenty of mentorships, conferences, like, and I still do believe like, you know, you, you heard about me from a conference I was at two weeks ago, but I was very intentional with that conference and put myself in a room with people that I didn't think that I was. Good enough to be in. And I did it on purpose because I knew that the energy and the frequency there would help pull me up to where I wanted to be.

So it was very intentional. I wasn't looking for somebody to give me the solution because at the end of the day, the truth is, is we have all the answers inside of us and conferences and mentors are really great because they can help us like fast track and skip some of the hard of the like. A, B, C, D, E, F, G to get there, you know?

And so like, you don't have to go through quite as much of a pain point, right? Like I'm going to give you a roadmap where I had to be the one cutting down the trees and figuring out which way to go. Right. So it can be such an amazing shortcut, except you have to have like foundation. Like you were talking about a house, like the foundation has to be you and you have to get back in touch with your intuition and who you are and being able to.

Look inside yourself for those support pieces instead of seeking them from the outside. Right.

Jen: Oh my God. I just get chills because honestly, it's like even also thinking about why you're even doing it. Your intention, like you said, your intention behind going to that conference was probably different than you went last month versus like if you would have done it two years ago.

It's really figuring out, you know, they say your why, right? With why you're doing it. But really it's like more than just, I want to make money. I want to support my family. It has to be deeper than that. Like, why are you doing this? What's your intention? Really like checking your mindset and not just going into things blind and expecting someone to fill you with all this knowledge and inspiration.

And like you said, expecting them to fulfill that within yourself. Yes, it can be. Amazing. Like you said, and it's honestly, I truly believe in like coaches, mentors, programs, like I'm all about it. Cause there's no way I would be where I'm at my business or myself without those things. But I have to say, I used to buy courses all the time and just like go through them, but I would never do anything with them.

So I felt like I was just being filled with information, but like you said, it didn't go anywhere. I have a

Michelle: course graveyard. Like the amount of that I'm signed up for that I didn't even end up taking is shocking. But I think something you said is really important, right? Like you mentioned the why and you kind of said it and like, Oh, the why, you know, like, cause it, it feels like such this, Oh, every, it's like this buzzword, right?

Like, what's your why? Leaning into figuring out what your why is, is the foundation because, uh, one of my mentors that I, as a longtime friend to Susie Ullman, she, she has a podcast, I think called your business will heal you, but she says, your business will heal you. And it's so true because your business is going to force you.

If you want to grow your business, your business is based on you. It starts with you. The founder is going to come from you. And so you have to have your why. And for whatever reason, for me. Digging into my why is what took me on that healing journey to get to where I am because it can't just be I want to make money.

I want to support my family. It's got to be something so much deeper. Like, how are you serving the world? You know, like there's a concept called, have you ever heard of Ikigai? I have, but you can explain it for us. Well, let's see. I'm, I'm kind of bad at explaining, like, regurgitating book information, but I'll have to, I'm trying to remember the four, like, categories, right?

So don't quote me, but go look up the, it's a book. It's called Ikigai. It's got some really interesting cons. Um, but the concept is based on like, I think it's a Japanese word, but. It's the researchers that went to this community and they, there's all these people who live like a super long time. I think they're called sentient ideals or something.

But the concept is like, what makes us fulfilled in life, right? Like what is our Ikigai, which is like our powerhouse, like where should we be operating in? It's like, you know, those circles that like intersect, right? So there's these four circles and they intersect in the middle and in the middle is your Ikigai.

So the four circles are like, what do you love to do? What are you good at? What is the world need and what can you be paid for? Right. And so like the middle of that is your IKI guy, which for me really really like brought me to my why, which ended up leading me into leaning into coaching.

Jen: Right. It's so true because like some things sound, that's why I like I'm big on.

I always use these words again and again, because I can't believe how much they've served me as like intention, which is kind of like the same, you know, your why and clarity, just getting clarity. Like, you know, when people say like, well, this looks fun or even when the, even with permanent jewelry, let's use an example, like, oh, that sounds, looks like fun.

But when you actually like dive in and actually get into the business. It's much more than what you think always. So like, and you end up having to deal with those things eventually. Like I said, I, going back to what you said, I said this very early on in business, like the first like year or two I was in business, I was like, nothing is making me face myself more than being an entrepreneur.

And I remember saying that to a friend and she looked at me like I was crazy. It was one of those moments where like, you remember, and I was like, it's so true though, like. I'm challenging my self worth constantly, what my money mindset, all these things. When I, if I go to a nine to five and I'm just working for someone, I'm just kind of, it's like, you're, you know, almost, I want to say like a zombie mode.

You're just going through these motions. Like you're not challenging yourself like that every day. You're safe. Yes, exactly. Like everything's up you with this, right? So you really, and also too, things become easier when your why and clarity and intentions are so clear because then you don't get caught up in these little things of like, Oh my God, I'm like embarrassed to show up in my stories and talk.

It's like, well, why, why are you doing that? You know what I mean? If you get clear on your intention, it's not about you. It's about kind of like what your big why is, right? Like that's what it becomes about.

Michelle: Sales is just energy, right? Like, like I, something, and this is from Susie Holman too, like, so that's why she's fresh on my, my mind.

I just put a call off a call with her. But, um, and she has some really great nuggets of like her one liners, but the way she phrases it is that like sales really is just a transfer of energy. And so I'm going to take that and expand on that and say like, so if sales is a transfer of energy, Then you better get in touch with your energy because whatever is going on inside of you is what you're putting out.

And on a frequency level, like if you get into the frequency, like I told you, I warned you I was a little woo woo, right? No, I love it. I love it. Love it. So much science behind it. So it's not that way, but if you get into the frequency, if you are putting off a low vibe frequency, you're going to attract like what you're putting out, you're going to pull in.

And so if you're frustrated in your business, because you were like, I, I'm trying to make more money. I feel like I'm putting myself out there. I'm trying, I'm doing all the things they tell me to do. And I just feel like I'm hitting a wall. I would take a step back and look in and see like, what is the frequency that I'm putting out?

Because it all starts with me as the founder. And I

Jen: have to say, I will say this because you know, you do know the P like certain people, if you can think of someone in your life or like all this stuff always happens to them. Okay. They get the flat tire. They get like, they always get like the rudest customer.

I'm like, really? Like God, you know? And I just feel like. Again, that's energy, right? It's energy matching energy. I totally believe that too. It's funny, you know, being an entrepreneur prior to permanent jewelry and I've been doing permanent jewelry for a year, a year and a half now, but I think like I've been saying this a lot with friends that are within the company too.

And we talked about this. It's like, I do feel like so much has fallen into place with this leg of my. Business, but I feel like, because when I went into this, like it felt so right. And my intentions were so clear and everything was so clear. It was different than my other business where I was new at it.

I was, I had to really build myself through that business. So it didn't start the same way as this business. Do you know what I mean? And I feel like things really great things have been attracted to me, but I think that has to do like you, like with the work I've done on myself, there's no way this business would be what it is.

If I would have started it when I first started entrepreneurship. Seven, eight years ago. There's no way there's a difference. And there's an alignment there that makes sense

Michelle: to me. Well, that's a journey and that's normal. And I think talking to people at different stages of their journey, like every stage you have, like every stage has a purpose.

If you're in the stage where you feel like you're really stressed, You're learning something like you're getting like, keep going. Like, don't give up. Don't let it beat you down because we've all been there. It's normal. You're not alone. You're not, you're not broken. You're not doing it the wrong way.

You're just in the messy middle and it's fine.

Jen: And honestly, as you said, we're always growing. Like we're always kind of questioning, even with you entering this new coaching realm. And like, but I think too, you get to a point where. You do build up your confidence in what your tensions are though, that you comes from a different place of fear, I guess.

You know what I mean? It's like confident

Michelle: fear. It's a more pure fear for me now. I think in the past it, it was more, it was definitely really heavy in the like, what are people going to think of me? That's not gone all the way like that, that will never leave. I just have to go with a different, but now it's more of a, like, I just want to serve people in the purest way.

Like, I just want to make sure that I am. Taking care of them the best way that they need to be taken care of, you know, and so I, like, it's such a different place, but it's still the same block that you have to deal with.

Jen: Yes. And also too, funny enough, I feel like you almost get used to that growth fear.

So it's, it's like a familiar place too. So you also deal with it differently than in the very beginning where it's so new and you're just like, you know, what am I doing? Um, you almost are like schooled in it. And again, you've built out, you built up this confidence and callous, I want to say callous, but that's just a weird word to use like to that feeling.

You know what I mean? So it's not as scary.

Michelle: You kind of know what you get tools. You, the more you experience it and get through it, you, even if no one's guiding you and saying like, Hey, this tool will help you, which is where coaches really come coaches and mentors really come into place because they can be like, Hey.

Here's the tools and the, like the things you need to help you get past these blocks. Right. And so without that, like you're, you're kind of stumbling and finding, but every time you go through it, you learn a new skill, whether you're doing it one at a time on your own, or you have a mentor or coach who's.

Can you say that again? It's called A, B, C, D, E, V. Yeah. Oh, I've heard that one. Like, you know, I've heard a bunch of different ways to do it, but, so I just, I've learned So the, so my goal is to make sure that, um, you know, I can do it in any direction that my clients want me to do, but I also wanna keep the value of the product that I'm giving So I like to make sure that they, that I do it the way that I would want them to do it It's such a growth.

It's like when you're lifting weights, right? Like you start with pounds and you're doing good. And then all of a sudden it gets easy. And so the next thing that gets thrown at you by your, you know, your trainer is 10 pounds and you're like, Oh, this is so hard now. And then the next thing is 15 pounds.

Like, that's how I feel like business and really life is meant to be like, we, this truth of like. We are perfect as we are, and we get to be here to grow and learn and be the best we can be, can both exist simultaneously.

Jen: Yes. And it's so great to have those reminders because, because again, as an entrepreneur, you're going to have those days where you're like, what am I doing?

I suck at everything. You know what I mean? This is so normal. And I think we get so caught up thinking we're the only ones that think this, you know, and then we go on social media and when we're having down days and we see all these people with these amazing reels and having success and talking about how much money they're making because entrepreneurship can be very lonely.

And even if you're also just talking about your coaching. Like if you're in a relationship where you're feeling that way, sometimes it's hard to voice those things even to our closest friends if they don't understand. And also they're not entrepreneurs. How, and not saying you're geared just toward entrepreneurs.

I don't know if you are, I guess I shouldn't say that, but I feel like I'm

not,

Michelle: I'm not. Well, I think with my relationship stuff and like the reason that's such a key piece for me is because I felt so alone. And I mean, I have been doing this entrepreneurial journey, which like, I know how to feel alone because you're right.

Entrepreneurship can feel so alone, especially when you're looking outside of you for validation. It's extra only then. So it can feel really lonely. But as I was going through what I went through with my husband, especially coming from a place where like people thought we were this great couple and my husband is a great guy.

Yeah, good guy. You know, but society is going through a change. Like women are showing up different and that requires men to show up different too. And neither of like, we're, we're kind of all sort of figuring out like, how does that mesh together? And what does that look like? You know? And so as I was going through that journey of, I had this great relationship.

Uh, and now I'm like literally thinking about divorce. Like what is happening? Who do I talk to? And then the few people I did talk to gave really shitty advice, like, excuse my language, but Oh my gosh, luckily I had done the work that I had done because some of the things that they said could have really.

Put me back in a negative place, you know, and so I think like seeking out coaching and the reason I really want to show up in this space is like, I have training now. Not only do I have experience in it, but now I have training. And so it's not like, Hey, this is what worked for me guys. So it's going to be what works for you, right?

Like, no, I am here to help you find the answers that are within yourself and help you get back in touch with yourself so you can hear them and you can get. backgrounded in this right here, who you are. Right. And so I think that's like, that's the key point

Jen: there. So how do you feel like, I mean, again, and you, you feel free to answer obviously what you comfortable asking or answering, but why do you feel like it took a turn in your relationship?

Was it when you were elevating yourself? And you were evolving and changing. Did that lend into like, It

Michelle: was kind of a perfect storm for us. So we we've been playing with the timeline of this a lot, actually, because my husband actually is going to be leaning into this as well. Like he really wants to start a men's group because he felt really alone on the guy's side of this because he had no support and everybody he was talking to was like, well, she should be happy because you're making a bunch of money.

And he was like, uh, that's not helpful. Yeah. Yeah. And so like, we've been talking a lot about like, okay, what are the key pieces of the story? Like, what are the pivot points? Right. Because we have a bunch throughout our 13 years of marriage. And looking back, like there was some, we didn't even recognize in the time really quick, kind of like where we came from.

So it kind of started, we were in Arizona right before we moved to North Carolina and it sort of started out there. There started to be little, little things that like, because I had been at this. point on my journey, like my self growth journey for like three ish years. And so I was like leaning into it.

And as I learned more and as you do, as you know more, you do better. That's just like, it is the truth. Once you see something, you cannot unsee it. So I started seeing things and I started like in a frustrated way, calling some things out and things would get better. So I'd call something out and things would get better for like a week or two.

And then we would sort of slip back into the bad habits and it was just like here and there. And so it wasn't a big deal. And then picked up our lives. I don't know where moved to North Carolina, no friends, no support, new house, new job. I walked away from my photography business, which honestly I had wrapped up my entire identity in.

I have got two kids and my husband went into this new job that ended up being a really toxic environment. Oh no. Now he goes through this really toxic environment with pretty toxic people for the next year and like it totally breaks him. This man has never had anxiety in his life and he's having anxiety attacks.

You know, like it was awful. So he had, he was going through his own journey and I started to get to this point and initially it was like, gah, something's wrong with me. Like, right. Like that's one of my negative cognitions that I deal with a lot is that like, I am the problem. So if something's wrong, it's my fault.

I need to fix it. It's no one else's fault. And it's my job to carry everyone else's crap. And so I really leaned in for the first, like probably six months to a year of like, something's wrong with me. And then I started being like, Hey, you've got a part to play in this. And he was in the middle of a trauma and I.

Felt unheard and I started getting louder and I get louder and out louder. And I got louder and it wasn't working. I was trying to convince him, right? Like, please see it, see it my way. And then like that validation of me seeking his validation came in and he couldn't see me anymore, right? Like he was so caught up in his own trauma that there was like a filter between us.

We couldn't communicate anymore. Like it was this whole world. And I think that, that I was still going on myself. journey. Right. Right. Like I'm still on this journey. And yes, I feel like that played a part into it, but also like I had had all of my pillars ripped out from under me, you know, like every one of them.

And like, we knew how to move. And for whatever reason, where we moved to it, just like we, we struggled making like friends and I couldn't find a good gym. And so I lost my workout routine. And so like, I ended up in a full burnout. Because I was trying to do it for every, I was trying to carry it for him. I was trying to carry it for me and I knew more now, so I couldn't unsee it.

And so I was frustrated about it and I was trying to convince him about it. was like this whole perfect storm. And I think I got to a point where we like, it didn't end home separation because I was so burnt out that I couldn't, I couldn't work out like all of the good habits that I had like built over time.

I couldn't, I like couldn't do them because I was so broken and so burnt out. And so like, I had to go into like cocoon mode and I asked him to move into a different room, which was the hardest day of my life, you know, because that's a piece of me having to say like, okay, I can't carry all of this. You've got to, you've got to move over here.

I think that that was a pivot point for me because I was able to go into a space where it was just my space. And I had to sit in that. And then, you know, and we had therapists, we went through some therapists and eventually we found a really great therapist that was helpful that I happened to, we started meeting with her and then I signed up for coaching school.

Because I was at that point in my growth journey. And so not only did I have a therapist that was helping us with like the past therapy stuff, but I now entered a coaching school where we had to coach each other and I was getting all of the coaching from these fellow people. All of these tools were being used on me to rewire and to release and to, and.

It was like crazy by the end of the, not, I don't think the coaching school is even over like part way through the coaching school, me and Austin went to this in person retreat with this therapist and she does EMDR, which is like an active form of it's a rewiring, right? It's a whole, it's a whole thing.

And we spent a weekend with her. And then it took about a month and a half after that. And then we finally like made it over this hill of like, okay, we are both showing up for us now. That was the pivot, right? Is like it took all of that to get us both to this point that like, we're not two halves. We were never meant to be two halves.

We have to show up as two holes because what we want to do is like world changing. Like we want to do big stuff. And if we want to do big stuff, we have to be whole. And then if we can come together as two wholes, how much more powerful will that be? And so like, that's where we got in October and we are still like that.

Once you get there, it's not like a, okay, cool. I know that I'm my whole and I'm back in touch. I can feel my intuition. Like we are good to go. Everything's perfect. I wish, you know, and, and I think I said in the beginning, like, I won't say that it. It didn't make it easier, but it made it clear. And I don't feel lonely anymore because now I'm back in touch with me, you know?

And like, we'll get in fights and we'll get triggered and we handle things so different because we'll be like, you know what I'm triggered. I'm going to walk away and I'm going to get curious about why I'm triggered. You know, curiosity is like such a key thing in this whole journey and like. We have a long way to go, but there's this hump of realizing I'm the solution, I am not the problem.

I'm my own solution, and he is his own solution. I'm not his solution, he's not my solution, and I can't carry, like, me carrying that stuff for him actually hurts him. And it hurts me and it creates a codependent relationship.

Jen: And I mean, I think this is just so important because not only in relationships, but just as women and mothers, it's like, you know, when you said you were like caring everybody, I feel like that's so common, you know, putting stuff aside for our children, which of course, some things you have to, but in the end, it's like, I feel like we tend to just put ourselves on the back burner in every way and think that the way the serve is to like be there in every way for your partner or, and your kids.

And really it's like, you need to fill yourself to be able to give to them. Right. Which. You know, it's like, we might know that, but actually to like really live that is so difficult.

Michelle: Sometime. Do you want to know a secret? Like I felt like the worst mom during this whole thing. Cause my, so my oldest is 10 and so she was like eight, nine during all of this.

She at one point came downstairs, downstairs, like I might cry during this because it just like hits home with that mom guilt, right? But like she came downstairs one time when me and Austin were just like yelling. at each other. And she was just like, stop, like, please stop. You know, like, and, and so you just like feel like the worst person because you can't show up.

And the secret is it's that you're not showing up for you because now I still, and arguably now I am three times as busy. I've, we just moved again. Cause we're crazy. So much on my plate. I'm starting, I'm trying to start another business. I'm in my second year of bonded, which is its own, like it is its own thing.

Right. And so I have so much going on and yet I feel like a better parent. I can show up for my kids so much better than I did when I was trying to carry everything for them.

Jen: Exactly. Oh my gosh, you did. Yeah. There's no better way to say that. And it's so true. And it's. I know we hear it, but it's just like, until you actually, if you're searching of why you feel the way you do, like, I, I think what I'm trying to say, it's like even in past relationships that when you talk about codependent in my past relationship, I was, it was like all about helping him.

Cause he was actually an addict. So I was like, always trying to help him, always trying to help him. I lived for him every, every move he made. And I thought I was just doing him a service, but in the end I totally lost myself. Within three years of that relationship, I left not even knowing who I was. And in the end it didn't help him.

Like he didn't leave the relationship any better than when, you know, so it's like. What, what happened here? And so you can kind of look at the same way for your children. If you're always kind of struggling and wanting to do something and feel something in your soul that you're meant for, but you feel like you, you have to do this for your children or your spouse or whoever, to, to really truly step into like what you said and filling your own cup and just, just trying it and even though it might be really uncomfortable, right?

To do. Oh, I

Michelle: guarantee it will be uncomfortable. Yeah, not might, I don't think you're right. It is going to be, especially with the conditioning that most women face, it will be one of the most uncomfortable things you do. Hey

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I hope to see you in there. If you're interested and wanting to find out more information, go to GoldieLinkSociety. com. And now back to the show. If you're in a relationship that is struggling, and especially if you're somebody who is wanting to start a business or in a business, because as all, as we know, is a whole nother pressure, but say your partner is not on board to work on the marriage.

What is your advice to that person? That's such

Michelle: a tricky one. I think my advice to them is that you have to start with you, because when you start with you, And you get back in touch with you and you get back in touch with your intuition and your inner guidance and your inner knowing because we all have it and it's stripped away from us at some point.

Once you get back in touch with that, you're able to show up with boundaries that are healthy for you. And for me, my husband met the challenge. Yeah, I feel really lucky because it did take, like our marriage wasn't going anywhere because I was just trying to convince him and he like would do it for a week and then fall off.

And so it didn't change until I really got in touch with myself and I said, these are my boundaries. My true self, my true knowing, I know what I am worth, I know what I deserve, this is my boundary. And as much as I love you and will always love you, if you can't meet that boundary, I am willing to walk away.

Yes. And the second I hit that point, whether or not he shows up, which he did and it's great. That's awesome. You know, and I've also seen so many stories where they didn't show up and they left and they found somebody who would show up. Right. But it starts with you. You do your work first and everything else will follow.

It's

Jen: so true. Cause in the end, all you have is you. So starting with again, changing yourself because we're always, even I can speak to like my husband, for example, who kind of is like on this, he's been getting healthier, eating healthier, working out. And at first, like, you know, I didn't want to join him. I was like, no, I don't want to do that.

But it's like you, you, if we never influenced and see changes of the person that you're with, and it's positive changes too. And like, not only just the way he's his physical, but just his mental clarity and like him not drinking as much alcohol and all the things that like you obviously get influenced by that.

Either I'm going to join him and get better with him, or it's going to separate us more. Same concept in a relationship of just you being a better person, right? It doesn't mean they're always going to jump on with you like your husband did. But in the end, it's, it's you, it's your life.

Michelle: So let's say your partner doesn't jump on and you end up having to leave.

If you've done the work, you don't need someone else to complete you. Exactly. You that's the whole concept, right? Like women, we are very much so taught that we need a man to complete us. I'm very much so like, not a, we don't need men at all. Right. But like, I don't need him to complete me. Exactly. I complete myself and that will lead to everything else.

Like that is the foundation of your house.

Jen: And speaking of that, even with boundaries. So back to when I first started my business, like I said, and it was kind of, I would want him to understand Jordan. My husband's not an entrepreneur. He doesn't think the way I do. We're very different in that way, which is actually serves us.

I think that's great. But in the beginning, I said, when I was looking to fill in these. fill in the holes of what I needed for the confidence of my, my journey of my business. But then once I discovered that I couldn't, I was coming home and like unloading into my, by my business, expecting him to like have some sage advice.

And like, so then I had to get to a point rather than being disappointed and looking and, and then his reaction, literally letting that play into my self worth. I was like, okay, I'm not going to share with him about this part of my life as I'm going to share with him what he needs to know, but not every little aspect.

And that's when I turned to again, coaches, mentors, networking groups, people understood. I'm like, those are my people to talk to about this. And then through me growing this business and him seeing like, quote unquote, success, seeing changes even in within myself. Then he joined in on the excitement and understanding more, but it wasn't me unloading, expecting him to fill my cup with it.

It was like me setting a boundary. And then realizing who I can turn to, how I can get the help and, and support I needed. And then it all fell into place.

Michelle: What a great example of that clarity and what that brings, so fulfilling that yourself and then letting the people come in. And it's funny because like, have you ever heard the phrase?

You're the sum of the five people you spend the most time with. Yes, yes. Yeah. So your partner is the person you spend the most time with. So either your partner or the people around you, your friends, whatever, they're either going to, as you are working on yourself and growing, they're either going to want to grow with you.

Or you're going to trigger them because you're going to be a mirror and they're going to be mad and they're not going to want to have anything to do with you and you're going to have to set boundaries. Like there's kind of no, like there's one or the other and you have to get so in touch with yourself that you're okay with people not coming with you.

Like people are in your life. For a reason, and they're in your life for a certain amount of time. And then it's okay to release them and to in a positive light. Like you don't have to be like, Oh, I hate you now. Like, let's not be friends. But like I had this, I have this good friend who we're just in different places in our lives.

And I'm very much so like, if you're friends with me and you're like, Oh, I wish I, Like, I really want to start a podcast. I'm the friend that every time you see me, I'm going to be like, so tell me about your podcast. Did you start it? Oh, what do we need? Like, we could build your website or let me help you get your LLC.

Like I'm a pusher. And so she would kind of like say stuff and I would really push her and that made her uncomfortable. That's not what she needed in her life. And we ended up sitting down and it was so scary and uncomfortable for both of us, but we ended up sitting down and kind of like having this, we used to call them DTRs in high school, like determine the relationship.

I love that. Determine the relationship where like, we're still friends and I love hanging out with her and I love spending times with her, but we Really laid down like, okay, Hey, neither of us are each other's inner circle. We are not one of each other's five because we're not aligning, but we are on that next level circle because I really love you.

And I still want to spend time with you. And we sat down and have that conversation. And like to this day, it's one of the most powerful conversations I've had because I'm like, I can have my cake and eat it too. Like I really can. I, I can keep my friends. In different levels, you know, if, if they want to be there and I can protect my energy and my space.

It's

Jen: so true because there are like, and that took me a long time too, because I'm a, definitely a girl's girl. I have my girlfriends. I've had some girlfriends I've had since I was 11 years old. When I got into this business world, I mean, that's like, and everybody gets on the phone and talks about their jobs.

But for me, my business is like my life, right? Like it's my passion. It's like such a big part of my life. When I would share it with certain friends, I definitely wouldn't get like the feedback or what I wanted to hear. And I would feel, I would just feel like it's a feeling, like get off that conversation and be like, I would just feel down.

You know, I was like, it didn't say they didn't say outwardly. Oh yeah, you shouldn't do that. But it was just, just a vibe, right? Like they didn't get it. And it took me a really long time. Like you said, to have these, like, I hate to say it, but classifications, like you said, like boundaries for certain, like.

Okay, I know I can talk to this person about this, even like you said, even relationships. I know I, this is a friend I go to when it comes to parenting because maybe we have the same mindset or like views about parenting or we, and like, it's like me, there was one time when I first started being a parent, I kept asking, really sharing frustrations with my friend who doesn't have kids.

What was I thinking? You know, I'd like the stuff she would come back with. I'm like, Oh my God. But it's like, you can't blame her. She has no idea. It's like no idea. When we

Michelle: live in the world, we live in the world of information and that doesn't all mean it's good information. And so we're all absorbing information and we all have filters.

We are all filtering everything that comes in. There is millions of bits of information coming at us. And I think our brain processes like 182 bits per second out of the millions. Right? So we're, we have to filter. And so when you go talk to someone about something, you really do it. I would venture to say like, it is imperative that you find what I would call like safe people.

Like there were certain people that I found that weren't necessarily. the safest people to talk to about where I was at in my relationship because when I would, like you said, when I would leave that conversation, I would feel less than I would feel low. I would feel kind of like back into this frequency of where I'd been before.

And because I was aware of it, I'd be like, Oh wait, this is where I'm coming from. That's not where I want to go back to. Right. And so like, I still have amazing, great relationships with those people. I just don't talk to them about that. If they ask, I say, I'll share certain things. And like, if they ask for advice about their relationship, like that's different, but I am very careful with who I talk to about that because within business, within relationships, within parenting, everything you do, you want to make sure that the people you're talking to are able to, aren't coming at you from a totally different filter with their responses.

Right.

Jen: And also just like not from where you've walked. You know what I mean? Like if they've never been there. Behind you. Yeah. I mean, you know, there's so many stories I can think of, but actually one in particular who a friend of mine who was actually going to start her own business and she was sharing it and this is what's so hard.

And I think it's such an amazing conversation to have. Because it took me a really long time to, to get to that. And I still struggle with this because especially when it comes to family or people that you're really not saying around, but like literally, like, even that's why it was so hard with my significant other, because I'm like, this is my best friend.

I'm supposed to be able to tell him everything. Like, you know, my mom, I mean, I want to tell her my mom, I'm not going to lie. And. Love her if she's ever listening to this, but like, there's certain things like with my business too, she doesn't really understand that. I can't like unload and tell her all these things and expect to get what I want from her with that.

Unfortunately.

Michelle: And even though you're seeing something outside yourself that you actually just need to find in yourself first. Yes.

Jen: True. Yeah. True. It's, it's just somebody, like you said, that you have your safe people, really, for her, it's, for that relationship, like, that's not a person I talk to about business, like, mainly.

I'll tell her the highlights, but, like, even this friend who was starting a business, her mother in law would be, like, very, like, put these, and it's, again, when you're, like, fresh, starting something new, it's, With, especially when you're looking to leave a full time job and take a risk, really be careful about who you talk to because you don't, you need all the support that you can get in a positive way because you can let somebody, you might even know, okay, she has no idea, but it's this person that you love and care about.

So no matter what, if they say something. That is going to get to you. It's going to get to you. Like if they, if they were putting doubt into you, how can you not like, let that, it's hard not to let that permeate a little bit. It's like, so I had to remind her, like, and also talk her through that. Like, well, your mother in law doesn't really know.

And she's been, you know, it's like, she's not of that world. She doesn't really understand. And like, you know, because I also too, she's coming from a place of care, like when people are scared for someone to take that risk and say they've never done it before and they're like, Are you sure this is okay? I mean, you have to think about this.

You have to think about this. And so then it freaks you out. You leave that conversation like, Oh my God, now I can't do this.

Michelle: Well, they're in a totally different path. Like I think something that was really releasing for me, like it gave me a lot of freedom was an. I would venture to say most people do not believe this, but this idea that like everybody is doing the best that they can with what they have.

And if that is true, like we are all on our own journeys, right? So this mother in law, like she's on her own journey and that whole entrepreneur thing that is not in her heart because it's not meant to be part of her journey, right? Because if, if something's in your heart, then it's for you. And so if you're talking to somebody about something that's not in their heart.

They're going to be like, you're crazy. You know, like when I left college to be a photographer, my parents, like my dad in particular was like, uh, what are you doing? You know, like everybody was like, okay, this is just like a hobby, right? Like you can't make money doing this. You know, like my whole family's in the medical field.

Like I was this, you know, my one sister's a hairdresser. And so I think that that was like helped me a little bit, but like, other than that, it was like, what is she doing? You know? And then. Five or six years in, they were like, Oh my gosh, my sister's the best photographer, like she's amazing. You know, they'll get there.

But at the end of the day, like I can't let someone else who's will never have that in their heart dictate. The path I take for something that is in my heart. And that's why you seek out people who have similar things in their heart, like mentors or coaches. Cause like I couldn't find somebody in my life during my whole like relationship marriage thing.

And I, my husband has really struggled to find that person, which is why he wants to create this men's group because we couldn't find people. Like we were actively searching for these friends who would fit into this five people. Right. But like. Because of where we're at in the journey our, like, we had really high standards.

Like we needed somebody who was very particular, you know? And so we had to find that in our therapist and in, in myself, in my own self, myself, through coaching school, you know, and Austin, he had to find that from our therapist and in himself, you know? And so like when you can't find those people, like I just got off a coaching call.

The other day with a client, you know, and she was like, I, I just don't know who to look up to, you know? And so we sat down and like, this can be a takeaway, like, this is a great exercise. If you're struggling with like who to talk to about stuff, I want you to sit down and write out, like design this person of who your mentor would like, who would they be?

And it's either design who somebody who like you would want to be like. Or write out what you would want your life to look like. Or if there's people that you are constantly getting jealous of, like on social media, slow down and look at what their life looks like and say, Oh, I wonder if I'm jealous because it's something that I want, like, I'm, I wonder if I'm being triggered.

And so like, take a second and then build out, like, what does this person look like? And then start putting it out there, right? Like start putting that frequency, start asking the guides or God or whoever you believe in to bring that person into your life. Because once you know who it is, you can look for it and then you just have to surrender and let it happen.

And it can come in such crazy forms, whether it's a friend or somebody you meet at coffee or in your workout class. Or like for me, it was a therapist. And then this random school, like I have a video of me when I signed up for coaching school, I was like. In a full panic attack because my spirit and my heart was like, this is for you.

Like you've been asking for this person. You've been asking for this mentor, this guide, and it's you, you have to go through this coaching program. So my spirit and my intuition that I had just got back in touch with was like, we're doing this. This is for you. This it's now or never. This is your thing.

And it was expensive. Right. My whole body was like, Oh, hell no. This is scary. This is uncomfortable. This is not what I'm going to do. This is totally an unfamiliar heaven type of thing. Like I do not want to do this. And so I'm like shaking and bawling and like trying to put my credit card information in.

And like, it was so hard, you know, but like, I knew that was what I was supposed to do. And people say it all the time. I know, I know, I know. If you are saying, I know about something and I'm not taking action, there's a bridge that needs to get built. Definitely.

Jen: If you're thinking about it all the time, if you, you can't escape it, you know, it's your gut, right?

It's your soul talking to you. I truly. I truly believe that, you know, even when it comes to relationships, just thinking about, I know like kind of bouncing back and forth, but this is all related to, of course, we're talking about in my past relationship, I would actually think at night, how would I leave him?

Like, what, what would I do when I'm single? If these things are, Oh, I'm like, why am I thinking about this all the time? But it's obviously that was like, but I would try to like stuff that down, you know? But it's like, if these things are constantly coming up for you, they definitely are something your soul needs to like answer that.

And really. Yeah. Absolutely. Getting back to, of course, the mentor thing that you said, I think it's so important. Like you said, even if you scroll through your feed and you're feeling a certain way, just be so aware of your feelings when you come across things. That's how I think.

Michelle: Curiosity. I think that's the key, right?

Like, don't judge yourself. And that's what I'm like. This is an ongoing lesson. So I'm like preaching to myself as I take, I say this, right. But like, it's curiosity, right? Like, how do we be curious about these thoughts and not judge them? Like, cause it's not that it's inherently bad. Like our subconscious, like its whole job is to protect us.

And so like different. Lots of us have learned these different ways to protect us that at one time did serve us. In fact, a story, this heard this story from a friend the other night and he was like, think about this man, right? And he's trying to get across the river. So he builds a raft to get across the river and it was so helpful getting him across the river.

And then he gets to the other side of the river and he's like, Oh my gosh, this raft was so helpful. Puts it on his back and starts carrying it like through the, like. That's kind of what you like we do, right? Like it, it's served and protected us for a time and then it stops serving us and it starts to become a burden.

And so it's kind of like figuring out like, okay, what parts of me are a burden now and do I need to let go? And how do I reprogram them into being like, I'm just trying to protect you. So I don't have to be mad at those parts. They're not bad. They're just trying to protect me. And so if I can just get curious and be like, Hey.

Why am I so like Susie Holman? And I keep, I know. Sorry. Love you, Susie. Super triggering for me for a long time. So we were like photographers way back when together, and then she went on this whole like journey of like becoming this amazing coach. And there was a period in time that I was. so triggered by her and I knew I was.

And so like, I was so triggered by her because she was doing everything that I wanted to be doing. And I was like, I wish I could be like her. I'm not good enough. Like, if only I could like, Oh my gosh, like what? You know, like sometimes I look at that and like. Even as that would come up of like, Oh, I wish I could be like Susie.

I would like beat myself up and be like, Susie's such a great person. Like, why are you harboring these negative feeling towards her? But like, it wasn't, it was just like, it was, it's trying to help me. It's trying to tell me something.

Jen: Exactly. All those feelings, gut feelings, feelings, just again, being so aware of them.

Cause like you said, turning everything into curiosity, like the whole jealousy thing, it's like, you're getting jealous. Of course, our one thing is just like, go right to being kind of like you said, like angry. Right. It's triggering stopping and asking yourselves like, why, why am I feeling, you know what I mean?

Just observe it, like observe your feelings, ask why you're feeling that way and let that serve you. Okay. What is it telling me about myself? And again, what I'm lacking, what I'm missing, what I, why am I envious of her or that situation? How can I have that more in my life or embody that? And just like you said, how you went to her retreat this past, like this month, actually, it's like putting yourself in a room.

Of people like that, that you're kind of like this level of envy, right? It's like, I always said that even the first mastermind I was in, I was definitely, and I'll say it every day. Like I was the dumbest person in the room. That's how I truly feel. I was way out of my element. I didn't know Jack about business at that point.

I just can't believe what a different, I look back and what a different person in that way of my self assurance and things that I was back then. And, but it only served me. To be in part of that mastermind, once you grow, you can't go back, like you said. So it's like, it just forces you to grow and being around that mindset of people, like that you are kind of envious of basically, you have no choice but to level

Michelle: up.

Yeah. Well, and it becomes almost like this positive peer pressure, like peer pressure exists. It's a thing like. You might as well use it for the positive, right? Like, if you're gonna let peer pressure influence you, then put yourself in a room of people you want to be like. Because it's, right, we're all operating at frequency, right?

Like, we are 99 percent energy. And so, like, we're all operating at this frequency. And so, if I can put myself in a room of people who are at the frequency I'm trying to get to, It's like a fast track, right? Like I'm in this met, like I went to this retreat, right? And now there's coaching. There's, it's like a coaching container after.

And every time I get on that stupid call and I've spent a week, like, like kind of falling into this, like beating myself up or like overthinking my content of like, okay, how do I share this? I want to be delicate and I want to say it away and I want to do this and I don't want to alienate, I want to be clear.

And I don't like all of these cycles that we all go through and it never ends. Right. Every time I get on that stupid call, and people are like, Oh, here's my wins, and this is what I did, and it was so uncomfortable, and I hated it, but look what happened, and I got this client, and I did this, and I'm like, I'll be damned if I'll be the one that gets left behind.

No way. I'm gonna, I'm gonna catch up in my own way, right? Like, and I, it's not about doing it like them, right? Like, I just have to trust my own timing, but like, I am not gonna get left behind. Like, I'm gonna be with these guys. Like, I'm in this room with them, you know? And so it is, it's like the, Fastest shortcut you can take is putting yourself in the room where you are the dumbest one in the room.

What is the intention? Or like we do it with where we live. Like the reason we moved so many times is because we would get in a place and we would find that like, okay, there's no one right around us that we're spending time with that we want to be like. You know, and that's not to say that we didn't have some good friends in a couple of places, but like they were just living different types of lives.

And we knew that we needed to be in the room with people or surrounded by people who wanted to be there. Like, we just moved into this house that like, I kind of feel like I don't belong. It's a fancy house. And we just, I was talking to one of my coaching clients and she was just like, I just don't even know, like I've never even stepped foot in something nice.

And like, but it's really on my heart. Like I just like environment is so important to me and it lifts me up and the frequency of where I'm at, you know, and like something, and it made me realize that something that we have always done is we have always put ourselves in positions where we were the poorest and we were the dumbest because we can be the poorest and the dumbest, then it's going to pull us up to the next level.

Right.

Jen: I love that. Okay. So real quick before we like cap this off and kind of ask to where people can find you and how to get coaching and what you're, what you're going to be presenting soon. Cause I'm so interested. I feel like I want to be involved in some way. Let's tie this into permanent jewelry really fast.

eally quick, you did start in: 2022

Michelle: Oh my gosh. They're so intertwined. And I remember when I, when I decided to do the franchise, I was like, this makes no sense. Like, I actually can't like, even until I think a couple of weeks ago, I couldn't figure out why I was supposed to have the space that I have. And I think such a big part of it is like how I show up for my clients.

Like we talked about earlier, like your business and it is an extension of you. And once you figure out why. Your why is how you serve your clients. And so for me, this all comes together in a way of like a couple of different things. First of all, the client thing, like I'm able to show up for my clients in a way where like, when my clients sit down to get a permanent jewelry, like a bracelet, they are not just here to get a bracelet.

It is not about the bracelet. I can get guarantee that I have good metals. I have proprietary techniques with how I connect them. Like you are getting top notch high quality and I guarantee it right. Period with the jewelry. Setting that aside, it's not about the jewelry. I am going to sit there and whether it's you coming in on your own, because you just broke up with your boyfriend and you are starting a new phase of your journey, I'm going to hold space for you and you can show up exactly how you are.

And feel safe and like where we're at. And as we're putting on this journey, now we're getting into the woo woo shit. We're going to renew this piece of jewelry with so much love and positivity and high frequency that every time you look at it, it's like an anchor and it's going to pull you up. Just a notch, right?

Or you're going to come in with your people and it's going to do the same thing. Right. And so like my coaching has really like been so intertwined with like the experience I provide on the permanent jewelry side, because my whole thing in general as a business owner is client experience. Like I am, that's my thing.

Like I'm top notch at it. I can see holes in other people's really easy. That's kind of how the coaching intertwines. But I think also like I jumped into this. Like literally I was talking to my friends and like, I'm in the middle of my freaking marriage falling apart. And like, like there's no reason I should have started this.

Like I was having like a crisis, right? Like I should have just taken time, right? Should have, should have. They like something popped up from one of them they'd shared about, or they were, I was talking to him. I don't even remember how it came about, but it popped up that they were just about to do franchises and I messaged them.

And I was like, I'm flying to Utah cause I was in North Carolina at this time. And I was like, I'm flying to Utah next week. Can you train me? And then that was it. And they, like, I was only there for two days, and so they, like, packed everything they could in, in two days, and then I Came home and just like went ham to the wall.

I did like hundreds of free bracelets. I sent them so many pictures of like, is this right? Or how is this like, what's the way to do this? Or what about this on the machine? And like, I like, like I almost blacked out. Like I have no idea. How I ended up here and bringing it back to this, like your business will heal you.

I needed bonded so much. Like what I give people in bonded is connection, like on a deep level. And that's what I would, I needed so bad at the time. And that's why I needed permanent jewelry and bonded because I was looking for the connection. So people would sit in my chair and not only would I be giving them connection, but they didn't know that they were giving me connection.

And that they were like, I just had people to talk to in the hardest time of my life when I didn't have any friends. Like all of a sudden, these people who sat in my chair, they're my best friend for 20 minutes. Those are the two connections, how I show up for my clients and I'm able to serve my clients on a level that is so much deeper than just like my physical product.

And then also. Just that, like, I needed the healing that came with building the business.

Jen: I mean, this is a conversation I'll have many times because obviously that's what I love about permanent jewelry, too, is a connection piece. But that's what I think plays into longevity of permanent jewelry because I think some people worry about the fact that it's a trend.

But I do think I see how special it is that I'm like, how could that go out of style? How can connection go out of style, really? I, I think it's here to stay for that reason. You know, it's, it's the experience. It's the, yes, it's the jewelry. It's beautiful. It's, you know, you know, all the things, but it's, it's the connection.

A

Michelle: hundred percent, a hundred percent. And once you get to that point, your business changes. Once you're able to show up for your clients and a like, and that's like working backwards, right? Like figuring out you so you can figure out your why, because your why feeds how you can show up for your clients in connection.

Jen: The inner work stuff, again, it's always ongoing, but to get like really clear on that, which is like, I know what you're doing with your coaching. If I would have done that in the very beginning of starting my business, you know, again, I don't regret anything. Of

Michelle: course. If we had done that at the very beginning, we'd be just like,

Jen: I know.

No. No. No. No. I'd be basically like next Oprah, you know what I mean? I'm just kidding. Oh my gosh. That'd be amazing. And that's why I, we can speak to like the wisdom of what we went through, you know, to help others because, you know, that's why it's so great that you're such a great, you know, mentor and coach for people is because we did kind of go through that, you know, on our own.

But again, if I did though, do that work in the very beginning and really get clarity I mean, gosh, and I do it and every, as we say, like we're constantly evolving in that clarity. We have to constantly do that. It's not just one, one time. And you're like, okay, cool. No, because our businesses change, we change, our lives change.

That's why it's like, we rarely sit down and really reassess, you know what I mean? And ask ourselves, like, has our why changed? Like, has our intentions changed? Like, does this bring me as much joy as it used to? And that's in relationships in, uh, you know, in business and in work and everything.

Michelle: You have to do that every year.

And I think one thing that actually saved my, like, I would venture to say was a piece in saving my marriage was that we sit down every single year and do that without, since like six years ago when we were like super poor, we were like, we don't want this anymore. So how do we change it? Well, the first thing you do is decide what you want.

And so we sit down very intentionally every single year. And set new intentions and new goals. In fact, this year, me and Austin are doing a workshop in March, uh, late March, early February. So that's like, I'll share more information on my page about it. But because this year we decided to set intentions in January and set goals in the spring, because on a biological level, that's what we're designed to do, we're designed to rest and reflect in the winter and then like really hit the ground running in March.

And so like being really clear and reviewing where you've been once a year. is imperative for your growth.

Jen: So true. Oh my gosh. Amazing. I can't wait to see, I can't wait to see where this goes with coaching and everything for you. So I know we could keep talking forever, but where can we find you? Where can we start following, get all the deeds, like share with us if you have any, um, what your plans are for coaching as of now, I know you're going to, we, We'll be seeing a lot from you, but give us all the goods.

Michelle: Yeah. So if you're interested in following me, Permanent Jewelry, it's bonded. charlotte. And then my personal page is Michelle Elise Taylor. Um, Elise is spelled A L Y S E. So just FYI. Michelle has two L's, but you can find me there. And then as far as the coaching I'm about to do, so I'm, I'm hoping to open up a beta group.

So I'm trying to build this, like I'm trying to build you guys a roadmap, right? Like a short. But because again, it's not about me bringing you the answers. It's about me helping you find your own answers and getting back in touch with you. I had to stumble through figuring that out. And so my goal is to say like, okay.

I'm going to give you an outline and I'm going to help you make this a lot easier and I'm going to show you the path. Like there's all these different paths you can take and you can tell me which path you want to take and then I'll walk you to the next work. And so, um, I'm kind of building out this outline in this, this program.

Um, and so I'm going to be doing a beta of it, hopefully opening the doors late February is the goal. I was trying to open the doors this, like this week, but it just, you know. Lots going on, lots going on, so I'm hoping to open that the last late February and it's going to be mostly like really a lot of one on one.

I'm still kind of trying to decide if I want to do a group aspect of it because that was a big piece for me is that I was so alone and I just wanted people that understood, even if they didn't understand my story, they understood the feelings I was having. But it will be majority like. One on one coaching.

So you're going to be coaching with me one on one, a ton. And it will be data priced, which I, it's going to be a lot lower than anything else we'll be moving forward. And that's not to say like this will be an investment because I truly believe that. Financial investment equals personal investment and we're going to be doing some hard shit and it's too easy for you if you only paid like a hundred bucks to be like, Oh, this is uncomfortable.

I don't want to do it. So it is still going to be an investment, but it's going to be a lot less than what my future investments are going to be. So if this is something that any of like. Your listeners are interested in, please come follow me. I'm going to be, I'm, I'm ramping up my social media. It's like a whole thing, right?

Like I'm, I'm building the content on like how to talk about this because it is kind of a hard subject and it's kind of tender, right? Like me and my husband, we're still trying to figure out like, how do we share this and it feels really vulnerable to show up in this space. I would love for any of your followers who are listeners.

Who are telling this to come follow me and send me their stories and like, I want to build this program with their help. I think it really changed the trajectory and speed up the messy middle because man, not messy middles.

Jen: I know. We all deal with it. We all do. All right. Well, thank you so much for your time.

This was an amazing, Oh my gosh. So many things to. You know, to dive into and to consider in

Michelle: any state. I promise we'll talk about a bunch of permanent jewelry stuff next time. know.

Jen: Well, that's what's so amazing because honestly too, whether or not the relationship aspect, but it's funny if someone is listening to this, that's considering permanent jewelry or already has an existing business.

It's really awesome that you do have both those where, you know, it's like that knowledge of knowing what that side is like to have a permanent jewelry business because it is helpful to, to kind of understand that what your life is like a little bit. I think that's going to even be more serving for people who are interested in your coaching.

Thank you so much. I look forward to chatting with you again, talking all permanent jewelry. for having me.

Michelle: I'm so excited. We'll talk to you next time. Bye.

Jen: Well, how do you feel? I hope this episode inspired you in some way. I would love to hear from you. So visit me on Instagram at GoldieLinksJewelry or at my website at Goldie Links.

com. I'm always down to chat. Have a golden day and I'll see you next time. Thanks for staying tuned. We'll see

Michelle: you next time.